Otaku Translation: Honey Badger's Streaming Life C75

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Everyone from Otaku Translation

The next morning was bright and cheerful, with the sun shining warmly and a gentle breeze brushing against the coastline. The beach in front of the hotel buzzed with life. Girls in sundresses and bikinis laughed as they chased each other, their joy mingling with the rhythmic crash of the waves. A volleyball net had been set up, and a lively game of beach volleyball was underway. The scene was idyllic, almost picture-perfect.

On any other day, Wang Ping would have been sprawled under one of the shaded lounge chairs, sunglasses perched on his nose, sipping an ice-cold coconut drink bought by Gu Lang while casually critiquing the various women passing by. But not today. Today, Wang Ping—or rather, the creature he’d become—was far from relaxed.

Three blocks south of the embassy, inside a small veterinary clinic, Wang Ping found himself strapped to a metal examination table in a position that could only be described as humiliating. Across from him, a young Asian woman in a pale green uniform bustled about, preparing what looked like an arsenal of medical supplies. Wang Ping’s eyes darted nervously between her and the ominous tools laid out before him.

To obtain the necessary quarantine certificate from the animal inspection center, they first needed proof of rabies vaccination and a series of other immunizations from a licensed veterinarian. And to get those documents, Wang Ping had to endure the dreaded process of being injected with multiple vaccines—all of which would expire within seven days. The waiting period for results? Another seven days. It was infuriatingly inefficient.

In his haste to save time, Gu Lang hadn’t even waited to confirm arrangements with Douyu before dragging Wang Ping straight to the clinic.

Slap!

A syringe with a gruesomely large needle and two glass vials clattered onto a stainless steel tray, eliciting an involuntary shudder from Wang Ping. Moments later, another syringe joined them.

Time seemed to stretch endlessly. Though it was embarrassing to admit, Wang Ping hated needles. No, scratch that—it wasn’t just Wang Ping anymore; it was this body. Even back when he was human—a towering, fearless man who’d once taken down armed criminals barehanded or tracked poachers through dense jungles—he’d always harbored an irrational fear of injections. Sure, he’d gritted his teeth through bullet wounds without so much as a whimper, but put a needle in front of him, and suddenly he turned into a squirming mess.

It didn’t help that, as part of WAP’s security team, he’d been subjected to countless rounds of vaccinations before overseas missions. Each time, his teammates had to physically restrain him, turning the ordeal into something of a running joke among the crew. Mention “the guy who screams like a stuck pig during shots,” and even the usually stoic Secretary-General couldn’t suppress a chuckle.

And now here he was again, tied down like a sacrificial lamb, except this time he wasn’t even human. If anything, the indignity felt worse.

Meanwhile, Gu Lang was making matters infinitely more awkward. The nurse administering the procedure happened to be Chinese—a young woman working at the clinic—and Gu Lang was practically oozing charm (or sleaze, depending on your perspective).

“Are you thirsty? Let me get you some water!” Gu Lang offered with exaggerated enthusiasm, leaning over the counter toward her.

“No thanks, I’m fine,” she replied curtly, glancing at him with mild amusement.

“Wow, you’re gorgeous! Like an angel in white!” Gu Lang exclaimed, his tone dripping with flattery.

She rolled her eyes. “Oh please, don’t try that sweet talk on me. You probably use that line on every girl back home.”

“Well, technically, you are an angel…” Gu Lang leaned closer, lowering his voice conspiratorially.

Klang!

The nurse slammed the tray loaded with vials and syringes onto the table in front of him, fixing him with a glare. “Let’s get one thing straight—I’m no angel. I’m a vet. Specializing in treating animals… and jerks.”

Who are you calling a jerk?

Wang Ping groaned inwardly. It was clearly Gu Lang who had been flirting shamelessly—so why was he the one catching stray curses?

But then Wang Ping caught sight of the lineup of syringes on the tray, and panic set in. His tiny bound body began thrashing wildly, every hair standing on end.

What the hell? One shot wasn’t enough? What was with all these needles?!

“Gu Lang! Save me! I’m not sick—I’m leaving! Screw going to China!”

Perhaps sensing the desperation in Wang Ping’s gaze—or maybe intimidated by the nurse’s icy demeanor—Gu Lang hesitated. Staring at the array of vials, he swallowed hard. “Uh… why are there so many?”

“They’re supposed to be!” The nurse shot him a disdainful look. “You really didn’t do your research, did you? For a proper quarantine certificate, pets need rabies vaccines, six-in-one vaccines, seven-in-one vaccines, deworming shots, kennel cough vaccines—the works. Did you think this was optional?”

“Awooo!”

Before Gu Lang could respond, Wang Ping let out a desperate howl and started struggling violently. So many needles?! Was this some kind of cosmic joke?

“I’m not his pet! I don’t know him! Let me go—I’m not going to China! Wahhh…”

“Uh… maybe I should wait outside…” Gu Lang muttered, instinctively backing away from the chaos.

“No way! You’re its owner—you need to stay and calm it down. What if it bites me?” the nurse snapped.

“Calm it down?!” Gu Lang stared at Wang Ping, whose eyes burned with murderous intent. He winced, still nursing fresh wounds on his face. “This isn’t exactly my area of expertise…”

“Bo- Boss… come on, it’s just a few shots. Tough it out, okay?” Gu Lang crouched beside the writhing bundle of fur, whispering soothingly.

“Awooo!”

Screw you! Why don’t you take the shots?

Wang Ping glared daggers at Gu Lang, ready to pounce if given half a chance.

At that moment, the nurse chimed in again. “By the way, it doesn’t look like your pet’s been neutered. Want to take care of that while we’re at it?”

“…”

Both Gu Lang and Wang Ping froze, stunned into silence. Wang Ping momentarily forgot his protests, staring blankly at the nurse’s back.

Turning around with a syringe in hand, she raised an eyebrow at Gu Lang. “You know what neutering is, right? We remove the testicles. It prevents hormonal issues, makes them calmer, easier to handle. So, what do you say? Should we go ahead?”

“Cut yours instead!”

Both Wang Ping and Gu Lang screamed internally, their legs trembling involuntarily. A chilling sense of dread washed over them.

Suddenly docile, Wang Ping stopped resisting altogether, allowing the nurse to approach with the needle.

“Uh… haha, never mind. Too cruel,” Gu Lang stammered weakly.

“Fine by me.” She shrugged nonchalantly, then swiftly plunged the needle into Wang Ping’s restrained arm.

“ROOOOAAARRR!!!”

A blood-curdling scream erupted from the injection room, startling the entire clinic. Cats yowled, dogs barked, and chaos ensued.

“Oh my god… Is this thing a honey badger or what?” The nurse’s face turned pale with exasperation.

Pets often cried during injections, but none quite like this.

“What did you say?” Gu Lang asked, his ears ringing from the deafening noise.

“Nothing!” She shook her head, grabbing another syringe. “Might as well finish quickly.”

“ROOOOAAARRR!!!”