Otaku Translation: Honey Badger's Streaming Life C154

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Chapter 154: Hail

Someone once conducted an experiment by clamping a wooden stick into the drill bit of a power drill, using its rapid spinning motion to mimic how ancient humans supposedly made fire by friction. The result? The wooden stick was quickly worn down, and the softer board, meant to catch the embers, ended up with a hole drilled straight through it. Despite some charred edges, not a single spark appeared.

This leads one to suspect that our ancestors probably only resorted to this method out of sheer desperation—and even then, their chances of actually starting a fire must have been laughably slim.

What put Wang Ping’s mind at ease about Gu Lang, however, was that he wasn’t the type to waste time trying to start a fire with sticks. He had just enough brains to know his limits and act accordingly. Instead, he opted for gasoline-soaked twigs and managed to get the flames going without much fuss.

Still, Gu Lang didn’t dare squander their limited resources. After pouring just enough fuel onto the kindling to ignite it, he quickly stashed the gasoline can back in the Jeep's trunk. They were still uncertain what lay ahead at the next supply point, and every drop of fuel would be crucial for crossing the Qiangtang Plateau.

Thankfully, the Wrangler’s rear compartment was holding up well despite losing its rear bumper. At least the tailgate remained intact; otherwise, they might’ve had no choice but to turn back.

Once the fire crackled to life, Gu Lang set up a tripod over the flames and hung a pot to boil water. Meanwhile, he wandered off toward the base of the mountain, breaking off several more branches before returning to hang his rain-soaked clothes and damp sleeping bag near the warmth of the fire.

The Jeep had already been driven across the river to the opposite bank. This section of the stream was narrower than others, and about fifty meters east of the tent, there was a shallow ford. After carefully scouting the crossing multiple times, Gu Lang confidently maneuvered the vehicle across.

Now it made sense why Gu Lang hadn’t seemed worried when faced with the obstacle of the river. With the Wrangler’s off-road capabilities, shallower streams like these posed little challenge.

After swallowing the last bite of jerky, Wang Ping dusted off his paws, stood up, tossed the empty wrapper into the fire, and trotted back to the car under the watchful eyes of the livestream audience. Moments later, he reappeared clutching a small black object in his claws—a T-shirt—and dashed toward the riverbank.

Seeing Gu Lang busy hanging laundry reminded Wang Ping that he’d completely forgotten about his own clothes. Earlier in the morning, after encountering those pesky Tibetan antelopes, he’d ended up covered head-to-toe in dirt. Though he'd washed himself clean, his filthy clothes were still crumpled under the seat.

“Holy crap… this water’s freezing!” As soon as his tiny paw dipped the shirt into the icy current, Wang Ping shivered involuntarily.

From the livestream perspective, the dimming light and distance made it hard for viewers to see exactly what Wang Ping was doing. All they could make out was a small, hunched figure crouched by the water's edge.

While scrubbing the fabric, Wang Ping surreptitiously glanced at Gu Lang, hoping he’d notice and come offer assistance. Asking outright felt awkward, but if Gu Lang offered on his own, Wang Ping wouldn’t hesitate to accept.

Unfortunately, Gu Lang was preoccupied boiling instant noodles and paid no attention to the honey badger creature washing clothes nearby.

"Sigh." Wang Ping sighed inwardly, a wave of nostalgia washing over him. When he was at Shengjiawu, Grandma would always tug him over during laundry day, strip off his clothes without a word, and toss them straight into the washing machine. Sure, it was embarrassing—but at least he didn’t have to do it himself!

“Fine. An adult… er, an adult honey badger should wash his own clothes!”

With a resigned attitude, Wang Ping scrubbed until the water ran clear, then shook out his stiff little paws and carried the dripping garment back to the campfire. Holding it up before Gu Lang without a word, he fixed him with a look that plainly said, “Here, hang this up for me.”

“Huh? You washed it yourself? Why didn’t you ask me to help?” Gu Lang asked, genuinely surprised.

Wang Ping: …Would you believe me if I said I was too shy?

In the livestream chat, viewers finally realized what Wang Ping had been doing by the river. Seeing him scratch his head bashfully, the comments exploded:

“Oh my god, first time seeing Boss with this expression!”

“So cute!!!”

“Boss’s rare meme moment!”

“Poor Pingping has to wash his own clothes…”

“LittleFriendLily gifted 3 rockets to the streamer…”

“Boss is way smarter than your average animal.”

“It’s normal—he trained, remember?”

“Do animals even know how to wash clothes?”

“XXXX instant noodle is best for outdoor camping!”

Wang Ping ignored the chatter, settling down beside the tent to dry his paws while glancing at the barrage of messages on the tablet. Honestly, these people were easily impressed. Having spent years on outdoor missions, he’d seen plenty of animals capable of cleaning things—from monkeys and apes to raccoons who practically lived to wash everything in sight.

As night fell, Wang Ping decided not to refuse Gu Lang’s invitation to share the tent. He discovered that the model recommended by Wang An truly lived up to its reputation, especially in terms of insulation. Once relocated to where the campfire had been, the interior stayed warm and cozy—far more comfortable than sleeping in the car.

At the insistence of the livestream audience, Gu Lang didn’t end the broadcast right away. Instead, he brought the tablet inside the tent. By the soft glow of a flashlight dangling from the ceiling, viewers watched as Wang Ping climbed onto a miniature hammock suspended within the tent, wriggled into a pint-sized sleeping bag, and promptly tossed his hoodie out.

The chat went wild, showering donations far exceeding anything received during the day. Gu Lang couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy as he muttered to himself about how few people appreciated the outdoors these days.

Meanwhile, Wang Ping didn’t care about any of that. He squinted his eyes and started dozing off, planning to fall asleep before Gu Lang’s snoring began. While he didn’t mind occasionally playing along for the livestream, constantly performing cuteness routines clashed with his stoic, no-nonsense personality.

Gu Lang sat cross-legged on his sleeping bag, chatting quietly with fans before officially signing off. Then, stepping outside, he added more half-dry branches to the dying fire, ensuring it would burn longer into the night before retreating to the tent for sleep.

The riverside grew quiet, save for the gentle murmur of flowing water and the occasional pop of embers. Sometime later, a dark cloud drifted slowly across the sky behind the distant snow-capped peaks, accompanied by faint rumbles of thunder.

Thud! Something dropped from the sky, landing softly in the water.

More objects followed, spreading across the shoreline. Under the flickering firelight, tiny white pellets began raining down, bouncing off the ground. The sizzle of wet coals filled the air as the flames dwindled, growing weaker by the second.

Inside the insulated tent, warmth lingered, cocooning them in cozy silence. Unfortunately, while the insulation blocked external sounds, it did nothing against internal ones. Gu Lang’s thunderous snoring reverberated through the darkness, driving Wang Ping to distraction. Frustrated, he rolled over in his sleeping bag, eventually pulling the hood over his head in surrender.

Outside, hail accumulated rapidly, blanketing the valley in white. Larger chunks struck the Jeep’s roof with loud thuds. A distant wolf howl echoed briefly before fading into the night.

With a final hiss, the last flame extinguished, leaving only the sound of falling ice and rushing water.

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