Otaku Translation: Honey Badger's Streaming Life C151

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Chapter 151: Enjoying the Show, Are We?

Do Tibetan antelopes fear humans?

In theory, yes. As a former member of the World Animal Protection (WAP) security team, Wang Ping could confidently say that nearly all wildlife—except for the fearless honey badger—fears humans. Even apex predators like tigers and lions instinctively avoid people. In their eyes, only dead animals pose no threat.

But when it comes to herbivores like Tibetan antelopes, they typically flee at the first sight of humans. On the plateau’s grazing lands, you’d never see these creatures lingering around human activity. If Gu Lang were to step out of the car now, the herd would scatter in an instant.

But here’s the question: do humans fear Tibetan antelopes?

For others, maybe not. But as Gu Lang stared through the window at the sea of sharp black horns surrounding the vehicle, his legs went limp. The sight was so startling that he broke into a cold sweat, despite having woken up desperate to pee.

“Boss… uh…” Gu Lang glanced toward the passenger seat, only to realize Wang Ping wasn’t inside. Peering out the window, he saw a lively scene unfolding outside. A circle of Tibetan antelopes had gathered, heads bobbing as newcomers jostled for a better view. It looked like a crowd watching street performers at a market.

Craneing his neck cautiously, Gu Lang’s eyes widened, and then a wave of uncontrollable laughter bubbled up.

By the side of the car, Wang Ping was utterly disheveled, panting heavily. His tiny paws were spread wide, each pressed against the heads of two stubborn young antelopes trying to butt him. His furry face radiated frustration, his gaze darting repeatedly toward the car door, silently pleading for someone—anyone—to come rescue him.

“You useless bastard, Gu Lang! Are you really just going to sit there?” Suddenly, Wang Ping’s eyes narrowed as he caught a fleeting glimpse of Gu Lang’s smirking face at the window.

“You little—ahh!” Distracted, Wang Ping failed to notice a sneaky lamb charging directly into his lower back.

Another round of “pinball” began.

“Hehehehe… hahahaha…” Inside the car, Gu Lang clapped a hand over his mouth, shoulders shaking with suppressed giggles.

It wasn’t exactly kind, but seeing Wang Ping’s current predicament was just too funny. Gu Lang knew full well that this honey badger wouldn’t hesitate to bite or claw anyone who dared touch his tail. Yet here he was, seemingly unable to fend off a group of playful lambs.

“It doesn’t even hurt, might as well call it morning exercise… hehe, serves you right for always bullying me,” Gu Lang snickered wickedly.

But soon enough, his laughter faded.

He’d woken up needing to pee, and the sudden shock of the scene outside had momentarily suppressed that urge. Now, with the tension easing, nature’s call returned with urgency.

“Oh right… I have a chamber pot somewhere…” Slapping his forehead, Gu Lang scrambled toward the backseat to search for it.

Meanwhile, Wang Ping was absolutely certain that Gu Lang—this damn coward—was awake and hiding in the car, thoroughly enjoying the spectacle.

“If I don’t beat you within an inch of your life today, I’ll change my name!” Clinging tightly to the neck of one young antelope, Wang Ping leaned against its body, using it as a shield to block the others while catching his breath.

This early morning chaos, on an empty stomach no less, was taking its toll. Even Wang Ping’s legs felt weak.

Just then, a shadow loomed overhead.

Looking up, Wang Ping met the dark, serious face of a large adult antelope.

Thwack! The big male lowered its head, shoving both Wang Ping and the lamb he’d been clinging to onto the ground. The force sent the smaller antelope scampering away, leaving Wang Ping sprawled in the dirt.

More lambs immediately closed in.

“Damn it… you’re blatantly favoring them!” Furious, Wang Ping scrambled to his feet, pointing accusingly at the offending antelope. Before he could unleash a torrent of curses, another lamb charged from behind.

Quickly turning to block it with his paw, Wang Pink glanced up—and froze. Stuck to the passenger-side window was a tablet, its camera pointed directly at him.

“6666”

“Buzz-Cut Bro vs. Baby Antelopes, Elder Antelope Spectating—Even Zoologists Haven’t Seen This!”

“Boss looks so pitiful, hahaha!”

“Laughing my ass off this morning!”

“Such an explosive start to the stream, gimme some chicken legs for the host!”

“Oops, laughed too loud, boss noticed me.”

“IllegalAccount gifts Rocket x6…”

“Looks like Boss is holding back; hasn’t even bitten yet.”

“Has anyone ever seen Boss use his teeth during streams?”

“YeHeng111 gifts Plane x6…”

“Go, Boss! Don’t lose to minors!”

“Hahaha, can’t breathe anymore.”

Outside the car, the antelope herd grew denser. Even those drinking by the lake earlier had wandered over to join the spectacle. Normally, their only entertainment involved watching male antelopes fight or young ones practicing combat. But today? Today was special. Clearly, curiosity knows no species boundaries—it seems even animals love drama.

Glancing around, Wang Ping noticed more and more antelopes gathering, bringing with them additional mischievous lambs. Spotting the tablet still filming him, Wang Ping feigned a dodge, tricking a nearby lamb before bolting toward the underside of the car.

“To hell with all of you! You think I’m stupid? I’m done playing games!”

But before he could escape far, a massive male antelope blocked his path. Nearly 70 centimeters tall, its enormous black horns bore a scarred face that screamed authority.

“Uh…” Wang Ping slowed, raising his small arms in surrender, attempting to negotiate.

“Listen, if you want me to babysit your kids, fine—but no biased refereeing, okay?”

Baa! The gesture was ignored. The dominant male simply lowered its imposing horns, ready to charge.

“Shit…” Wang Ping muttered, reluctantly returning to the fray.

Time dragged on until nine o’clock. Only after every antelope had taken turns drinking did the herd finally begin moving westward, their departure coinciding with the rising sun warming the air.

When Gu Lang finally opened the car door, Wang Ping lay sprawled on the ground, gasping for breath amidst countless hoofprints. His once-black T-shirt was now a dusty yellow-brown, his white fur matted and filthy. And worst of all? The ground was littered with pellets of antelope droppings. Gu Lang hesitated to even check the tent, which he’d left unzipped last night.

Skirting around the Jeep, he tiptoed carefully to avoid stepping in anything unpleasant before crouching beside Wang Ping. Adopting his most ingratiating tone, he asked, “Uh… Boss, you okay? Hungry? Want me to cook something for you?”

Wang Ping’s eyes flickered. Seemingly weak, he lifted a tiny arm and beckoned Gu Lang closer.

“Hmm?” Gu Lang leaned down reflexively, thinking Wang Ping wanted to whisper something secretive.

But the moment his face drew near, Wang Ping sprang up like a coiled spring. One paw planted firmly on the ground, he executed a perfect spinning kick.

Smack!

“Augh!”

Gu Lang reeled backward, clutching his nose as he stumbled and fell flat on his rear.

Landing gracefully, Wang Ping charged straight for him.

“So you decided to enjoy the show, huh?”

“Playing dumb, are we?”

“And streaming it live for everyone else to laugh at me, no less!”

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