Otaku Translation: Honey Badger's Streaming Life C72

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Whenever he failed to suppress his laughter, a piece of dried fish would mysteriously appear on his face or head. After the dried fish was gone, it was replaced by squid strips, lobster tails, spicy kelp, abalone snails, and more. Gu Lang couldn’t figure out how an inland city like Karatu could have such an abundance of seafood snacks.

By the time dusk fell and the car entered the outskirts of Dodoma, Gu Lang’s head was practically a seafood platter.

In the distance, the city lights had already come on. From afar, the glow formed a hazy curtain over the city, resembling a massive beast lying dormant in the night.

Unlike Karatu, a tourist city outside protected areas, Dodoma was the current capital of Tanzania—a true metropolis and transportation hub. It boasted a complete public transportation system, schools, museums, historical sites, and sprawling residential neighborhoods.

Of course, there were also countless slums.

If measured solely by area, the space between Dodoma’s geographic center and Dodoma University alone could fit five Karatus. But when it came to population density and per capita income, Dodoma might not necessarily surpass Karatu.

Although Tanzania had decided to move the capital here back in 1974, it wasn’t until February 1996 that only the National Assembly reluctantly relocated. All other government offices remained stubbornly rooted in Dar es Salaam. And where the government went, foreign embassies followed. As a result, many countries internationally still weren’t sure which city was the real capital of Tanzania.

Neither Gu Lang nor Wang Ping cared much about these national affairs. For them, reaching Dodoma meant they were halfway through their journey to Dar es Salaam. The remaining half could be completed by train directly from Dodoma.

Gu Lang drove straight to the central train station in the heart of the city. After securing a standard room at the New Dodoma Hotel just outside the station’s southern gate, he settled Wang Ping and their luggage inside. Then, leaving Wang Ping behind, he drove off to return the SUV to a rental agency located several stops away.

Only after Gu Lang left did Wang Ping finally shake off his sulky demeanor from the journey. Sneaking over to the bedside where Gu Lang had stashed his backpack, Wang Ping began rummaging through it like a thief.

After hours of contemplation, Wang Ping suddenly realized something: his bald tail tip—wasn’t that essentially a ready-made finger?

The thought of finally being able to operate touchscreens as freely as humans do filled Wang Ping with excitement. He imagined playing games, watching movies—all the things he’d been unable to do before.

But mindful of the earlier embarrassment in front of Gu Lang, Wang Ping tried to act indifferent toward the tablet, pretending not to care so as not to invite further ridicule.

What Wang Ping didn’t know was that the more nonchalant he acted, the harder it became for Gu Lang to stifle his laughter. Even after settling Wang Ping in the hotel room and returning to the car alone, Gu Lang burst into uncontrollable laughter before driving off. Clearly, holding back all this time had been no easy feat.

With great urgency, Wang Ping rummaged through the backpack and immediately spotted the tablet casually stuffed near the top. Carefully extending his paw, he lifted it out and turned around, sitting cross-legged on the bed with the backpack propped behind him. Pressing the power button on the side, he lit up the screen.

Since this was a backup device, aside from the Douyu live-streaming app, Gu Lang hadn’t installed any other entertainment apps. However, basic utilities like QQ and WeChat were pre-installed.

Wang Ping considered his options. If he downloaded a game now, he wasn’t sure how well his tail would work, nor whether he’d have enough time to uninstall it before Gu Lang returned. Watching a movie seemed safer.

Glancing down at his bald tail tip, Wang Ping gave it an experimental flick across the screen. The desktop flipped two pages, revealing another row of icons.

“Just as I thought!” Wang Ping exclaimed internally, thrilled by the sensation of his tail tip making contact with the screen.

Finally, he was no longer helpless against touchscreen devices!

After a few more practice swipes, Wang Ping discovered that only the bare skin at the very tip of his tail registered input. Other parts of his tail were still covered in fine fur, requiring too much pressure to be effective.

For Wang Ping, using his tail was akin to mastering a new limb. It lacked dexterity and strength compared to human fingers, often requiring assistance from his paws, much like handling an unruly stylus.

As he scrolled through the screen with his tail, Wang Ping suddenly realized a more pressing issue.

Yes, his tail worked now because the hyena attack had left it bald. But what if the fur grew back?

“Do I have to stay bald forever?” he wondered, shuddering at the thought of becoming a perpetually bald-tailed honey badger.

“No!”

The initial joy of discovering how to use the touchscreen quickly faded. Appearance, it seemed, mattered more than entertainment preferences.

For now, however, Wang Ping didn’t need to dwell on such dilemmas.

Dragging one of the metal boxes Gu Lang had left by the bed to use as a stand, Wang Ping propped the tablet horizontally against it. Leaning back against the backpack with his legs crossed, he used his tail to tap open a video app.

Lost in thought, he failed to notice that Gu Lang had deliberately—or perhaps absentmindedly—left the tablet’s Wi-Fi receiver powered on, tucked away in the backpack.

Almost fatefully, as Wang Ping scanned through the rows of program thumbnails, he clicked on a documentary titled Life on Fire: Earth’s Inferno.

The opening scenes featured various animals meeting unfortunate ends, either voluntarily or involuntarily.

Staring blankly at the screen, Wang Ping’s breathing gradually slowed, and the occasional flicks of his tail relaxed. Exhausted both physically and mentally from the day’s events, he unknowingly drifted off to sleep.

When Gu Lang returned from dropping off the car, it was late. After compensating the rental agency an additional Tanzanian shillings roughly equivalent to 5000 chinese yuan, he hailed a taxi back to the hotel. Upon entering the darkened room, he saw the faint glow of the tablet screen and heard the narrator’s voice—and, unmistakably, Wang Ping’s snores.

Instinctively slowing his steps, Gu Lang approached the bed. Looking down at Wang Ping and then at the program playing on the tablet, he mused aloud:

“I thought you liked watching pretty girls? Oh… right, he probably doesn’t know how to find ‘Little Fox’s’ livestream…”

Contrary to Wang Ping’s fears, Gu Lang wasn’t curious about why Wang Ping was using the tablet. Instead, stroking his chin, he pondered whether he should demonstrate how to access Hu Li’s livestream next time—right in front of Wang Ping.

But as his gaze swept across the screen again, it landed on Wang Ping’s tail, illuminated starkly by the tablet’s glow in the otherwise dark room.

There was no avoiding it; in the dim light, the only thing clearly visible was Wang Ping’s bald tail tip.

Remembering that Wang Ping’s claws were made of keratin and thus incapable of operating the touchscreen, Gu Lang stared at the tail, his expression growing increasingly odd.

A vivid image flashed in his mind: a honey badger squatting in the dark, grinning mischievously as he carefully extended his bald tail toward the tablet screen.

“Pfft~”

Clamping a hand over his mouth to stifle his laughter, Gu Lang hurried into the bathroom and shut the door tightly behind him. Muffled bursts of suppressed laughter leaked out from within.

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