Otaku Translation: Honey Badger's Streaming Life C58

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The occupant of the lower bunk smacked his lips, turned over, and pulled the blanket over his head, leaving only his rear end facing the door. Meanwhile, Wang Ping’s ears twitched once, twice, thrice. When the soldier knocked for the third time, the badger grabbed a pillow he didn’t need and hurled it forcefully at the door.

Thud!

The knocking stopped.

Outside, Colonel and his entourage felt as though leaves were swirling above their heads, casting a gloomy backdrop.

“Forget it! Let’s check the vehicle instead…”

Colonel decided to save face, avoiding the embarrassment of breaking down the door.

A group of guards accompanied them to where the off-road vehicle was parked. As soon as they approached, a foul stench hit them, even stronger than the day before.

The chiefs and Colonel naturally kept their distance. So, witnesses Kumi and Atugo reluctantly donned masks and rubber gloves, trudging toward the car to inspect it.

Soon, a pile of miscellaneous junk emerged: a broken thorn branch near the pedals, a moldy empty can under the seat, bloodstained and muddy bandages, golden fur from what appeared to be a large animal, various bone fragments scattered in the corners, and a small piece of hide resembling a hyena’s ear.

As more disgusting items surfaced, everyone’s brows twitched involuntarily.

But the most revolting discovery came from the deepest part of the backseat—a maggot-infested roasted deer leg.

Though the outer layer still retained its crispy golden hue, peeling it back revealed something far less appetizing. Atugo promptly vomited.

His reaction triggered a domino effect. Soon, several figures bent over beside the SUV, retching violently.

“This guy must be the filthiest foreigner I’ve ever encountered!” Chief Blake from Karatu complained bitterly.

Colonel hadn’t thrown up. From the start, he’d pinched his nose and refused to come closer. Now, watching the nauseated “elite” team, he frowned and asked, “Did you find anything unusual?”

Unusually nauseating, yes, thought several officers simultaneously.

“There’s a bullet hole!”

One of the soldiers who had tagged along finally noticed, pointing to the backrest of the driver’s seat.

Having frequently endured grueling field exercises, soldiers were accustomed to unpleasant sights. Compared to street-patrolling policemen who fined people daily, these soldiers spotted details first.

This revelation left the police officers feeling humiliated. Atugo and Kumi exchanged glances, each receiving sharp glares from their superiors.

Colonel nodded approvingly at the observant soldier and stepped closer to examine the area.

Indeed, due to its location near the lower edge of the seat, the bullet hole was hard to spot unless scrutinized carefully.

In such a putrid environment, only soldiers tough enough to eat raw earthworms in the wild could conduct such meticulous inspections.

Following the trajectory of the bullet, they found the embedded projectile in the rear seatback, confirming that Atugo and Kumi had indeed encountered this very vehicle.

“But this position…” Colonel gestured to the soldier. “Sit inside and mimic dodging the shot!”

The soldier complied. Everyone gathered around to observe.

Habitually, the soldier sat in the driver’s seat, one hand gripping the steering wheel, leaning toward the passenger side to dodge imaginary gunfire.

However, those outside wore grim expressions. It was clear that the bullet hole was behind the soldier’s position. If Gu Lang had dodged similarly, his grave would already be sprouting weeds.

“You said last night that you didn’t see anyone in the car?” Colonel turned to Atugo.

“Uh, yes, yes,” Atugo replied nervously.

“Hmm… Could it be because the driver was black, so you didn’t notice?” Colonel’s offhand comment sent ripples through everyone present.

Damn it, what are you implying?

At that moment, another soldier ran over, whispering something to Colonel.

“I know.” Colonel waved dismissively, visibly annoyed but also relieved.

……

Wang Ping woke naturally, feeling refreshed after finally dispelling days of fatigue. For once, he was in a good mood.

But as he sat up and stretched, catching sight of his furry paws dampened his spirits.

“Shit, why didn’t I die in my sleep? Maybe I’d have turned back into a human by now!”

Feeling crusty eye boogers and sweat trapped beneath his thick fur, Wang Ping decided to take a shower.

Gu Lang, on the other hand, had spent half the night awake, finally dozing off in the wee hours only to suffer diarrhea from the chef’s questionable cooking. He managed to fall asleep just before dawn. But when he was sleeping soundly, a swarm of tiny bugs seemed to invade his nostrils, causing unbearable itching.

“Achoo!”

With dark circles under his eyes, Gu Lang sneezed himself awake, immediately spotting the badger standing by the bed.

Wang Ping casually retracted his tail. Honestly, using it to wake someone up worked better than claws.

“Morning…”

Gu Lang rubbed his eyes, greeting weakly.

Wang Ping glanced at him, then hopped off the bed, trotted to the bathroom door, pointed inside with a claw, and turned to look at him.

Gu Lang, having long suspected Wang Ping once lived among humans, found this behavior unsurprising. In fact, compared to eccentric dogs, dealing with Wang Ping felt almost pleasant.

After searching fruitlessly for slippers, Gu Lang stuffed his feet into the foul-smelling sneakers and shuffled to the bathroom, still half-asleep.

“What’s up, boss? Do you want to shower or poop?” Gu Lang asked curiously.

Truthfully, he was more intrigued by how Wang Ping usually pooped. Would his expression be cute? Would his tail get in the way? Might it stick up high? If possible, he’d love to witness it—even film it for fun.

Alas, Wang Ping denied him the opportunity, pointing clearly at the showerhead: I’m taking a bath!

It wasn’t that Wang Ping needed Gu Lang’s help—he’d used the shower himself yesterday. The switch wasn’t too high; a jump would suffice.

The real issue lay in the lack of running water in this remote conservation area, far from major cities. The barracks relied on soldiers regularly filling outdoor tanks with fetched water.

The reason Gu Lang was summoned? Wang Ping had enjoyed his shower so much the previous day that the outdoor tank was now—sadly—empty.

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