Otaku Translation: I! Anomaly Cleansing Agent! C24

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As dawn began to break, the diligent worker Leon dragged himself out of bed, yawning as he trudged along the path to work. After being hit by the biting autumn wind, his mind cleared slightly. Instinctively, he pulled Anna’s knitted scarf tighter around his neck, wrapping it an extra loop. His thoughts drifted back to last night…

Melanie’s question had gone unanswered in the end. He’d mumbled something vague about how she’d understand when she was older, brushing it off with a half-hearted excuse. Even if he had tried to explain it to her—a child of only a few years—she likely wouldn’t have grasped the full meaning. But when it came to information about the Anomaly Cleansing Bureau and anomalous objects, it was better for ordinary people to know as little as possible. The less they knew, the safer they’d be.

Still, Melanie’s question hadn’t been entirely without merit. At the very least, it had helped Leon piece together a small mystery—what the Chief had lost.

...

According to the intelligence provided by Materialist Soul, anyone possessing the anomalous object Love Without Memory would inevitably lose one of three forms of love: parental love, filial love, or romantic love. Judging from the Chief’s behavior, it seemed she had lost the love of her children. And yet, based on her actions yesterday, she clearly adored children.

After all, Veteran’s Alley, where Leon lived, wasn’t exactly a slum, but it wasn’t a desirable neighborhood either. Surrounded by noisy, dirty companies and a prison housing serious criminals, there weren’t many residents, let alone children. Naturally, there were no small shops selling candy nearby.

The colorful wrapped milk candies she’d bought for Melanie and William could only be found at a department store several streets away. For her to walk such a distance just to buy sweets for two children she’d just met… Clearly, she wasn’t someone who disliked kids.

Hmm… For someone who loved children so much, not being able to have their own was already a heavy blow. But if, after having children, they kept forgetting her… That must have been a cruel fate indeed.

Shaking his head sympathetically, Leon prepared to quicken his pace toward the Anomaly Cleansing Bureau. He planned to pick up the black goat and visit the nurse suspected of harboring an anomaly. But just then, a sweet, roasted aroma stopped him in his tracks.

A handcart loaded with stools and tables, a large tin hot water boiler with copper taps, a glowing charcoal stove, and makeshift low tables cobbled together from sawhorses… Amidst the rich scent of coffee, a snug little space wrapped in old canvas came into view. Shielded from the autumn chill, it radiated warmth.

A coffee stall…

Gazing at the inviting little stall in the cold, gray morning, Leon hesitated for a moment before giving in to the tempting fragrance. Hunching his shoulders against the cold, he stepped into the tent and took a seat at a table near the back.

“Boss, one coffee and two slices of thin bread.”

“Coming right up!” The vendor grabbed a handle-less cup, deftly sprinkled in some coffee powder, then used a rag to twist open the steaming copper tap and pour in hot water. With a few swift turns of a stirring stick, a steaming cup of black liquid was placed before Leon.

“Would you like butter on your bread? If you’re interested, I also have ham slices. They were freshly fried just before I opened the stall this morning—they’re still warm.”

“Uh… How much are the ham slices? Are they expensive?”

“No, not at all! Very affordable!”

After wiping his hands on his sooty apron, the fifty-something-year-old vendor gave a hearty laugh and held up a single grimy finger.

“One copper coin without ham, two copper coins with ham.”

Two copper coins… One extra copper coin just for a slice of ham? Are you trying to rob me blind? I can buy an entire ham at the department store for less than a silver coin!

Leon shot the seemingly honest but utterly cunning coffee vendor a deadpan look and muttered, “Forget the ham. Just butter the bread… Make sure it’s thick.”

“Got it!” Unfazed by the failed upsell, the vendor cheerfully retrieved a loaf of bread, slicing two paper-thin pieces with practiced precision. Using a brush so small it could barely polish shoes, he spread a meager amount of butter before tossing the slices onto the stone slab above the charcoal stove to toast.

Damn… This guy’s business tactics are shameless.

Staring at the slices of bread so impossibly thin they looked like they might be carried away by the slightest breeze, Leon couldn’t help but feel utterly ripped off. He’d clearly stumbled upon a master of overcharging. But since he’d already come this far and couldn’t bear to leave the cozy warmth of the fire, he decided not to complain. Instead, he picked up the steaming cup of coffee and took a cautious sip.

Mmm… So good… It feels like I’ve come back to life…

As the warmth of the cup seeped into his hands and the coffee settled in his empty stomach, Leon closed his eyes contentedly. Right on cue, the crafty vendor delivered his bread slices.

“Here’s your meal, sir. That’ll be one copper coin.” Glancing at the almost translucent slices of bread on the plate, Leon reluctantly paid up, though he couldn’t resist a jab. “Boss, with knife skills like yours, I’m sure you’re raking in the profits, aren’t you?”

“Heh, just scraping by, barely enough to keep the pot boiling.”

Used to customers making snide remarks, the vendor didn’t bat an eye. Instead, he chuckled and pointed to the stove behind him. “Take a look at my stove—it burns the finest charcoal, constantly replenished to ensure every customer gets piping-hot coffee no matter when they arrive. That charcoal costs money too, you know!”

True enough… But with your audacity to charge one copper coin for a single slice of ham and your bread-slicing expertise, the extra cost of the charcoal probably gets recouped tenfold within minutes. You’re definitely not losing money on this deal.

“To be honest with you,” the vendor continued, sensing an opportunity to turn Leon into a regular, “customers like you heading to the municipal district for work don’t really care about getting the best deal. What matters most is genuine warmth.”

Seeing that Leon wasn’t entirely convinced, the vendor gestured across the street and patiently elaborated. “My coffee might not be the sweetest or strongest, but it’s always served at the perfect temperature. My stove burns the hottest, keeping the tent warm even outside. And for your convenience, I use thick ceramic cups instead of those flimsy metal ones that burn your hands after a second. No matter how you look at it, you’ll leave here feeling warm inside and out.”

“Look at all the other stalls out there. Why do you think mine has the most customers? It’s not just about the coffee—it’s about the warmth I provide on a cold morning. Makes sense, doesn’t it?”

“Oh, and one more thing,” the vendor added suddenly, realizing he’d revealed quite a bit of “trade secrets.” Flustered, he waved his hands and said sheepishly, “Please don’t go spreading what I’ve told you! This little coffee stall is something I plan to pass down to my daughter. No matter how things go for her in life, she’ll always have a way to make a living. If others learn these tricks, she’ll be in trouble!”

“...”

I’ll believe you when pigs fly! Someone as shrewd as you wouldn’t just spill all your secrets like that.

Not to mention, this coffee wasn’t sweet at all, yet I followed the sweet aroma here. Clearly, there’s more to your pot than meets the eye. If I tried pulling off what you’re doing, I’d probably end up selling my pants to cover the losses.

Tsk… That said, though this guy is stingy as hell with his portions, he’s clearly put a lot of thought into this. So, fair enough—he’s earned the money.

Impressed by the coffee vendor’s business acumen and emphasis on added value, Leon couldn’t help but give him a thumbs-up. He quickly finished his bread and coffee, then hurried off toward the Anomaly Cleansing Bureau.

Not long after he left, a baby-faced girl in a professional skirt suit followed the lingering sweet scent down the street. Spotting the seemingly kind-hearted coffee vendor, her big, watery eyes lit up, and she rushed over, tugging at the man’s sleeve.

“Dad! You’re not fully recovered yet—how could you sneak out here to set up your stall again? Mom’s furious!”

“Hmph! What’s she got to be mad about?”

The previously affable and humble vendor snorted, transforming into an unreasonable stubborn old man. “What? Are you looking down on my little stall too? Let me tell you, if it weren’t for this coffee stand, our family would’ve starved to death years ago. Would we even have what we have today?”

“Ugh! No one’s looking down on your stall! But did you have to set it up today of all days?”

Seeing her father suddenly acting petulant, the baby-faced girl sighed in exasperation.

“Our gas company pipeline cracked, and we just paid out a huge compensation. On top of that, the waterworks company’s in trouble too—it’s a mess right now. Mom’s upset because instead of focusing on handling these issues, you’re out here running your stall first thing in the morning…”

“What’s there to handle? Earn what we can, pay what we owe! Stop overthinking things. And why does it matter if I only work two hours a day? Will the company fall apart without me?”

The coffee vendor grew even angrier, puffing up indignantly.

“Besides, I warned everyone from the start: we shouldn’t have touched those municipal projects! Sure, they bring in steady profits every year, but we don’t hold the decision-making power. We can only suggest; we can’t decide. How’s that supposed to work?

“I knew from the beginning that those bastards’ way of doing things would blow up in our faces sooner or later! We should’ve stuck to running our department store. Sure, the profit margins are thin, and the risks are higher, but at least we’d have control. If something went wrong, we could fix it ourselves.

“But no, your mother had to be stubborn! She insisted that with our reputation, people would tread lightly around us. She dove headfirst into this mess, and I couldn’t stop her!

“And what happened? Those greedy bastards cut corners on filtration costs and dumped raw sewage straight into the public water supply! Now half the capital’s buying diarrhea medicine like it’s going out of style! Did they show any restraint? Not a damn bit! They’ve got no shame!”

After grumbling under his breath for a while, the vendor noticed that the sun was rising, the temperature was climbing, and the customers were dwindling. He extinguished the charcoal fire, packed up the tent, and pushed his cart away with his daughter in tow, still muttering as they walked.

“How’s the gas pipeline incident going? Did you apologize properly and offer compensation?”

“Yes, yes! One family didn’t seem to want much—they said they weren’t seriously injured, so covering their medical expenses was enough.”

“If they don’t want it, that’s their business. But if our company caused the problem, we need to ensure proper compensation… By the way, what’s their name?”

“I can’t quite remember the surname… Oh! Lion! Yes, Leon! Leon Lion! He’s a really nice guy—gentle, always smiling, and especially kind to his younger sister despite not having much money.”

...

“You’re asking about the new recruit in our bureau? His name’s Leon, Leon Lion.”

Elsewhere, two other people were also discussing Leon.

“Lion?” At the familiar-sounding surname, the petite woman in the golden mirror blinked, taking a large bite of her sponge cake before asking curiously:

“A member of the Duke of Lionheart’s family? I thought you hated nobles. Why’d you let him into the Virgo Bureau?”

“It’s just a coincidence in names.”

After briefly explaining Leon’s surname, the red-haired chief glanced at the woman in the mirror, who had set aside her cake and started nibbling on a puff pastry. Frowning slightly, she asked: “Why are you asking about him? Are you trying to poach him?”

“Well, I won’t deny it.” Without hesitation, the petite woman in the black-and-white checkered dress picked up a ring-shaped nut cake, licking off the sticky almond powder before flashing a mischievous smile.

“I read your report. This [Mandatory Information Acquisition] ability has a rank even higher than that of a Greater Demon. Used correctly, it’s incredibly powerful. What chief wouldn’t covet it?”

“...”

Watching her friend’s suddenly narrowed eyes in the mirror, the petite woman devoured the cake in one bite, then grabbed a small oil-fried pancake, spreading strawberry jam on it as she spoke.

“But don’t worry—I’m not here to poach him. I just want to make a little deal… Did you extract the anomalous object from that hospital director?”

Ah, so that’s it… You’re eyeing the object that absorbs patients, aren’t you?

After glancing at the lion carving on the golden mirror pawing at a dung ball, the red-haired chief paused briefly, a flicker of understanding crossing her eyes.

In Beverly’s jurisdiction, which fell under the Leo Bureau, a port overrun by an out-of-control contaminated individual had afflicted nearly ten thousand residents in nearby villages with an incurable plague. If the contaminated individual died, so would everyone else. Although the Leo Bureau acted swiftly to seal off the port and prevent further disaster, they were powerless against the hostage situation. Using their trump card for a mid-scale event like this wasn’t feasible, so they had no choice but to leave it be—for now.

But now things were different. The late hospital director’s ability—to absorb patients—was the perfect counter to that specific contaminated individual. According to the Anomaly Cleansing Bureau’s rules, the person who completed the cleanup mission had priority claim over the extracted anomalous object.

So, Beverly contacting her through the [Celestial Sphere Mirror] today wasn’t just a casual catch-up between friends. She wanted to get ahead of the situation and ensure Leon didn’t contest the object…

Staring at her best friend, who had started eating cheese pudding in the mirror, the red-haired chief batted her sly fox-like eyes, her expression troubled.

“Well… I understand how important this is to you, but Leon witnessed the contaminated individual’s power firsthand during the cleanup. He’s very interested in that anomalous object, so…”

“Tch! Cut the crap!” Knowing her friend’s personality all too well, Beverly rolled her eyes in the mirror, munching on coconut bread as she snapped irritably: “Just spit it out. How much money do you want to borrow this time?”

“Oh, c'mon. it’s not about money.” The red-haired chief waved dismissively, smiling coyly.

“Leon’s just a rookie who worked hard to complete his first mission and finally obtained his first anomalous object. Something with such sentimental value—if you just take it away with a word, wouldn’t you feel guilty not giving him something good in return?”

“...” At this point, Beverly froze slightly on the other side of the mirror, the orange cream pie in her mouth suddenly tasting bland.

After hastily finishing her snack, Beverly summoned the imposing demeanor expected of the Leo Bureau’s chief, slamming her hand on the table and glaring fiercely like a lion. “Out with it! What do you want?”

“I want you to trade him the Witch’s Broom.”

“Pfft! Keep dreaming!”

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