Please support the translation by reading the translation and commenting on otakutl official site.
Thank you.
Everyone from Otaku Translation
Previous | TOC | Next |
Chapter 20: Bro, You're Crazy!
As the off-road vehicle hit the road again, Gu Lang, sitting in the front driver's seat, sported a red mark on his face and had two wads of tissue stuffed in his nostrils—courtesy of Wang Ping’s kick.
At this moment, Third Brother Gu was muttering under his breath in a muffled, disgruntled tone. His expression showed annoyance, but his voice carried a hint of sheepishness, creating a bizarrely contradictory aura that almost made Wang Ping burst out laughing.
It all started back by the river when Wang Ping, unable to hold back, kicked Gu Lang square in the face as he squatted down to eat some instant noodles. The reason? That damned "circus" remark.
Initially, Wang Ping didn’t quite catch the jab. But later, as Gu Lang squatted by the fire to eat after he meticulously cleaned every inch of the car, he casually threw out: "By the way, what did you perform in the circus? Jump through flaming hoops?"
At first, Wang Ping thought he misheard. But no—this time, the insult was crystal clear.
Circus? Flaming hoops? You’ve got to be kidding me!
Clearly, this freaking guy wasn’t brave enough for a direct confrontation, so he resorted to veiled insults. Was this a dig at him, suggesting he was like a circus monkey, good for nothing but making a fool of himself?
Already sensitive about his current "identity" and still fuming from making a public spectacle of himself on camera, Wang Ping couldn’t have asked for a better excuse to vent his frustration. Gu Lang just happened to be the perfect target.
In the end, Gu Lang sobbed his way through that bowl of noodles, thanks to the well-placed kick that landed square on his nose.
"If you don’t want me to talk about it, just say so… no need to hit me…”
"With a temper like that, who can even stand you…"
"I didn’t mean anything by it. You're just too sensitive…"
"If I ever ask again, I’ll… I’ll…"
Along the way, Gu Lang kept mumbling, though he dared not raise his voice, fearing that one wrong word would land him another "lesson" from Wang Ping.
But in his sulking, Gu Lang failed to notice something: on the route Wang Ping had directed him to, the number of animals they encountered steadily decreased. Earlier, the road was alive with wildlife—zebra herds and other majestic creatures roamed the plains. But as they ventured west, even a ground squirrel became a rare sight.
Unfortunately, Gu Lang’s focus was elsewhere.
Gu Lang swore it was just an offhand remark. He never expected Wang Ping to actually respond—let alone so forcefully.
For an "animal," Wang Ping's comprehension and vocabulary were ridiculously advanced, which left Gu Lang too scared to grumble audibly, worried he might accidentally hit another nerve.
From Gu Lang's scattered complaints, Wang Ping pieced together the misunderstanding and was completely floored by the man’s imagination.
So, this guy genuinely thought that he and Rosette were abused circus animals who had escaped?
No wonder Gu Lang had been giving him those strange looks. Wang Ping had assumed he’d slipped up somehow, but it turned out Gu Lang was just overthinking.
That said, Gu Lang’s assumption wasn’t entirely terrible. At least it showed the guy had some empathy for mistreated animals.
"Still… this story of his is actually a pretty solid cover. Logical, with well-designed cause and effect…” Wang Ping mused, leaning against the passenger seat, his head tilted in thought.
Could this guy be a divine gift sent to act as his sidekick? Wang Ping had been racking his brains for a way to explain his behavior, and here was Gu Lang, solving the problem unprompted. If protagonists in web novels got cheat powers after their reincarnation, maybe his cheat was this guy?
Wang Ping glanced at Gu Lang, who was still muttering to himself, and felt a pang of disappointment. “...Guess I should treat him better…”
But before Wang Ping could follow through on that thought, Gu Lang suddenly slammed on the brakes.
Caught off guard, Wang Ping and Rosette, lounging in the backseat, were both thrown to the floor.
"Roar!" Rosette yelped, her injured hind leg flaring up as she flailed in the cramped car before scrambling back to her seat, dazed and groggy.
Wang Ping wasn’t much better off. He’d hit his head on the floor, leaving him dizzy and disoriented. Just as he was about to lose his temper, Gu Lang jumped out of the car in a hurry.
"What the hell is this idiot doing?!"
Gu Lang might not know where they were, but Wang Ping did. They were smack in the middle of lion territory. Getting out of the car here was practically begging to die.
Why doesn’t he ever learn?!
Wang Ping quickly scrambled to the dashboard, climbed onto the hood, and peeked out to see what Gu Lang was up to. The sight made his blood run cold.
Gu Lang had picked up a small, sandy-colored animal no longer than half a meter from the grass in front of the car. He lifted it up and inspected it, sighing in relief when he found no injuries.
Hearing noises from the car, Gu Lang turned and grinned at Wang Ping, standing on the hood.
"Look! Good thing I spotted it in time, or we might’ve run it over. Poor thing. Would’ve been such a waste to die in the middle of nowhere… Is this a wild dog? Cute little guy!"
A wild dog? Seriously?!
The fur on Wang Ping’s head practically stood on end. If the situation weren’t so dire, he’d give Gu Lang a sincere thumbs-up and yell, "Bro, you’re crazy!"—and he’d mean it.
Who else but Gu Lang would casually pick up a lion cub in the middle of lion territory and evaluate it like this? Crazy was the only word that fit.
"Roar!"
"Roar!"
Suddenly, Rosette’s frantic roars filled the car, sharp and warning. Wang Ping’s instincts kicked in, alerting him to an overwhelming danger closing in. If Gu Lang didn’t retreat immediately, his chances of surviving this would be less than zero.
No longer concerned with how embarrassing it might be, Wang Ping let out an urgent howl in Gu Lang's direction: "Awwooo!"
"What the heck?!" First, it was Rosette, then it was Wang Ping. Gu Lang was completely dumbfounded by the sudden outbursts of these two. He had no idea why they reacted so intensely to the puppy he was holding. It wasn’t just him—something hidden in the bushes was also stunned into silence by Wang Ping’s shout.
This lion could swear on her cub’s life: that sound absolutely wasn’t made by any local animal!
But come to think of it, that made sense. What local animal would be bored enough to come here and, right in front of her, mess with her cub? Did they think she wasn’t digesting fast enough?
Gu Lang originally wanted to show off to Wang Ping. After all, no matter how one looked at it, he was the one who saved this puppy, and that was all thanks to his heroic efforts. He had even planned to righteously declare himself a protector of animals! Maybe then Wang Ping would stop acting like a ticking time bomb around him.
But as soon as Wang Ping let out that shout, Gu Lang’s brain started to clear, and his heart began racing uncontrollably.
Holy hell, he’d been duped! Where was he? The savanna! Even if there were dogs on the savanna, they shouldn’t look like this! This thing looked exactly like a lion cub. Uh… right, what family do lions belong to again? Felidae or Canidae?
In that instant, Gu Lang’s brain was working overtime, perfectly demonstrating what it means to have one’s thoughts racing a hundred miles a minute. In less than two seconds, his mind had already traveled to the far corners of the earth. Then, as if he’d touched an electric wire, he suddenly screamed, “Oh my god!” and tossed the little lion cub out of his arms before bolting for the car.
“Roar!”
Just then, an African lioness weighing at least over 100 kilograms leaped out of the bushes, landing right where Gu Lang had been standing moments before.
As she watched her cub trace a parabola through the air and land in the grass, the lioness's eyes turned red with rage. Her sharp claws lashed out toward Gu Lang. If that swipe had landed, Gu Lang would’ve had to change his name to Gu One-Pile.
But just as the claws were about to strike, Gu Lang, with reflexes that left Wang Ping utterly dumbfounded, had already slammed the car door shut and stomped on the accelerator.
Wang Ping could swear on his life that Gu Lang's reflexes were far from normal. In that split second, the guy’s agility was downright terrifying—so fast it even outclassed Wang Ping himself, a man with professional military training. Before Wang Ping could react, Gu Lang had already started the car and hit the gas.
Just as Rosette sensed the overwhelming danger and was about to leap out, the car roared to life and shot forward.
The sudden acceleration threw Wang Ping back into the cabin, where he collided headfirst with Rosette, who had been poking its head out. The two tumbled onto the backseat in a heap.
“Roar!” Behind them, the enraged lioness gave chase, relentless.
Damn it! Where the hell did this group of lunatics come from? Bully her cub and then try to run? Did they think they could just ignore the queen of the savanna like that?
Please vote for this novel at
If you would like to support this translation, you may choose any one of the options below.
How to find a list of chapters
Please find the chapter label next to your favorite translator's name, and click the label.
No comments:
Post a Comment